I know I shouldn't have been surprised. But what can I say? I'm optimistic and still harbor a smidgen of naivete when it comes to my faith in the decency of the average human being.
This past weekend, for three separate shifts, I experienced for the first time what if felt like to be a person stationed at a table, trying to raise money for charity.
I mean, I'm no idiot. I've seen how many times the average Southern Californian whizzes by a person asking for a donation to the Salvation Army or to help the homeless or what not. If I have cash on me, I am never one of those Southern Californians. I drop some money in the bucket.
However, I get the skepticism people have in handing over any amount of money whatsoever to a person claiming to be from a charity. I get that much of the time you are in a hurry and speed on by without so much as a glance or utterance of "Sorry. Not today."
This past Saturday and Sunday, I experienced being rejected again, and again, and again. It is actually pretty incredible how many people act like they don't hear you when you are standing three feet away from them. They stare straight ahead, too busy to deal with whatever worthy cause you are endorsing.
This past weekend, I was standing outside an Ihop in Laguna Niguel, Ralph's in Laguna Niguel, and a Ralph's in Cypress. I was helping a charity called California Helping Hands Foundation raise money for special needs children, to be able to take them to events like baseball games, bowling, amusement parks, the Safari Park, and etc. Events and places they wouldn't otherwise be able to go to. Places that would enable these kids to experience life as any other kid would...to bring a little joy into their lives. Some of these excursions are once in a lifetime opportunities for them.
So...the IHop customers were much more responsive and gracious, but then again, who wouldn't be on a full stomach?
The Ralph's customers? Oh, how much I came to hate them. Which is TOTALLY the opposite of what that experience should have caused me to assess. I get people are busy and in a hurry. I get that. But I also am smart enough to know that some of these humans had nowhere to go in a hurry. They were simply in a hurry to get away from me.
Much of them shook their heads "no" or said "no thanks" before I could even finish my sentence. I had a nice-sized colorful, eye-catching banner behind me, with pictures of these special needs kids, that I from time to time would point to. No matter my pitch, short or a little more elaborate, (or even something as simples as "Hi! Would you like to help these Special Needs kids?"), the fish were not biting.
I feel like people would sooner drop $20 in a raffle or contest to win a sports car they have one in a millionth chance of winning than donate $20 to a cause they KNOW is guaranteed to go to a good place and help people who actually need it. But...who doesn't know someone who would rather person their own selves first? They'd rather buy a product for themselves than give to someone else.
It irks me so how people are so plain stingy. One guy rolled up in his Corvette but declined to donate. Another woman scowled as she exited Ralph's when I asked her if she would like to help "Special Kids with Special Needs". She says in a very abrasive tone, "No thanks. No thanks." And then with her scowl, rolled her cart away.
Perhaps my favorite response of the entire weekend was, "Not really. I got problems of my own." I smiled at him and said ok, and in that moment I came to realize how two-faced I was becoming with these people. They'd say, "No thanks" or "not today" or "sorry, I can't" and I'd smile and say, "OK!" While inside, I'm scathing with anger. They can't stop for 5 seconds? I mean, really?
And by this point, you guys are probably thinking, "Typical. What did you expect? Nobody donates to those things."
I mean, yes, I expected rejection but I didn't expect SO MANY PEOPLE to be so dismissive and even cold. And to ignore me altogether? Agh! So rude!
Which brings me back to the guy who when I asked if he'd like to help the special needs kids and the man responded, "Not really. I got problems of my own." That...what kind of response is that? Guess what, buddy? Everyone has problems of their own. I certainly do, but you don't see me trying to dismiss the needs of these children, and not even drop a dollar into the bucket. Or a quarter. Or a dime!
I had an elderly woman yell at me for a good almost five minutes, angry that we were trying to raise money for these children (who had down syndrome, multiple sclerosis, cerebral palsy, autism, to name a few...which I mentioned to her). "What makes these children so special? Why do they get to go to Disneyland?" (she asks vehemently.)
Me: Well, we are not trying to say one child is more special than another, but in this particular case, we are trying to raise money to take these children to places they wouldn't be able to go otherwise. Unfortunately, because of their disabilities, sometimes they are outcasts from society--
Her: (angrily) No, they're not!! And she stalks off P.O. (wow.)
So mad! Ohmigoodness, she was so mad we were doing this for these children.
I mean, in many ways, I can understand the standpoint of so many other people, but the question is simple. Can you spare one second or one dollar to help out someone less fortunate than you, whether it be through a donation, or working at a soup kitchen or building homes for Habitat for Humanity?
If you can't, that's your prerogative. And that is the only justification you will get from me.
